While we on the topic of all the things I'm not...

I'm also not a seamstress. And unlike coupon clipping, I really wish I could sew better than I do. Part of the art of sewing is measurements and I'm really bad at math. Another part of the art is direction following. And, yes, I'm terrible at that as well.

Gee, I wonder why I'm not a good seamstress.

I wanted to cover some chairs for the kids playroom and here is my very feeble attempt:

Before

After

Good enough for a playroom huh?

Frugal is not my middle name

I have a confession to make. And you can keep reading because, no, it's not about another one of my very personal issues.

My confession is that I'm not a thrifty person. I don't clip coupons, scour through the Sunday paper or peruse different stores for the best deal. And until yesterday, that used to bother me.

Recently I was with some friends who were talking about coupons, web-coupons, CVS deals, Walgreens deals and money saving blogs. They don't pay for toiletries, save $40 bucks with coupons at the grocery store and try to keep their grocery bill at $60 a week! Seriously.

I started feeling really bad about my spending habits, my lack of coupon use and my general non-frugal personality. Really bad about myself. I spend 3 times that (literally!) at the grocery store, very rarely look at a sale ads and tend to forget my coupons at home most of the time.

Mercy, did I look pathetic next to these thrifty ladies.

So I came home and told Joseph that I was going to start clipping coupons, we weren't going to buy anything without a coupon, we weren't eating out ever again, we were going to live frugally and I was going to make it my mission to hunt for the best deal. We were going to get our veggies out of the grocery trash and our bread from the throw out bin at the bread store. We weren't spending any money at Christmas and I was going to handmake everything - homemade meals every night and I was even going to make Titan's dog food.

And as usual, he looked at me oddly and said something like, "That sounds like a lot of work, but if that's what you want to do..." and then went back to FB.



So I began my mission: Frugal Living. And for the past week, I attempted that.

I bought the Target brand diapers even though I am a Pampers Cruisers snob because there was a coupon for a dollar off. (The twins still wear diapers/pull-ups and nap time and bed time.) I also bought the Target brand pull-ups and wipes for the same reason. On that trip I got 3 packages of wipes, 1 package of diapers and pull-ups and 2 Buddy bar soaps for $18. Less than the amount of money I would normally spend on 1 pack of diapers! Pretty awesome huh? Oh, yeah, I'm thrifty!

And while I was glad to get a good deal, that was a lot of work. Really. It took me forever to find the coupons, I ran out of printer ink printing them (and really don't know how to hand make printer ink!) and while in Target the kids all had to go to the bathroom, and none went at the same time. The whole thing was exhausting.

As the week went on, I was spending all this time looking for coupons and deals and not finding any coupons for anything that I actually needed. Whew, it really started to take up a lot of time.

Then I decided that, FOR ME, it is not worth my time. There are lots of other things I would rather be doing. I don't get a thrill searching for the deal, I found it to be more of a hassle. It took up lots of my time and to be honest - I don't want to hunt bargains on spaghetti sauce in my (very limited) spare time. And that is my personal choice that my husband is supportive of. That man is less thrifty than me! He hates shopping around at different stores for a bargain. His motto that he is always spouting off to me is, "Time is money, money is time. I can always make more money, but I can't make more time."

By nature I'm not a thrifty person. Case in point: Yesterday I went to find something for us to wear for our family pictures. I'm sure I had something at home that I could make work, but I had a specific idea in mind and knew we didn't have that here. I am sure that my thrifty friends would never go out and buy new outfits. Sheesh, some of these blogs I was reading were giving ideas on how to spend $0 at Christmas. I don't want to spend $0 at Christmas.

It's really all about moderation is my conclusion. I sell the kids old clothes to make money for new ones. That's resourceful, huh? And I shop the commissary for meat (can't beat the prices!), Walmart for groceries (can't beat the prices!) and HEB for fruit - because the other two places have nasty produce. I used some store coupons at the commissary yesterday and saved $18 on things we actually use, so I didn't clip the coupons and the lady handed me the coupons and told me to use them. Points for heeding good advice huh?

Bottom line: I buy toiletries, is that really worth beating myself up about?

Things that make me laugh

Everytime I read my blog entry from yesterday I laugh. Really hard. And not just because of the story, but because how surprised everyone has been that I would share that kind of detail.

Hehehe! I love it! I love being shocking! Really, I do.

Yesterday I did some yoga to help stretch out my very tight muscles. Today, the plan was to start my Jillian workout. I say, 'was' because that plan went out the window when I woke up and felt tired and sore. I think it would be good for my body to take some time off from the gym and rest.

Unfortunately, I have no idea what it means to rest. Instead of going to the gym, I steam cleaned all the carpets in the house. It wasn't rest, but it was therapeutic.

I have some pictures of the race that I will post soon. Until then, here are some pictures of my silly girlies - mercy, I love them! (BTW - do you think they're identical?)

13 Thing I learned from my half marathon experience...

1. I now know why most runners are glad that they don't have menstrual cycles. Especially ones that start the day before the race. Um, yeah, 'nuff said.
2. (and if you thought #1 was more information than you wanted to know...) Vaginal yeast infections, very bad ones, that arrive the day before the big race equal NOT fun. Especially when you will be sweating for 2+ hours. More than 'nuff said!
3. Signs that people make and hold up are very important and motivating. My two favorite from yesterday were, "Pain is temporary, pride lasts a lifetime" and "Philippians 4:13 - Pound the pavement!"
4. It is very important to maintain speed and concentration during mile 7 and not be distracted by the man dressed in a Malibu Rum Bottle passing you. One should NOT, I repeat NOT, try to catch him. You will pay for it at mile 9.
5. Diarrhea at mile 5 HAS to be dealt with. Immediately. Even if the line to the bathroom is long, just be thankful that there is toilet paper. WAY more than 'nuff said!!!
6. Running in 72 degrees with high humidity feels way hotter than it sounds. Way, way, way hotter. Especially when you have been training for long runs in 50 degree weather.
7. The volunteers handing out water and GU, ROCK! Their smiles and encouragement help keep you going.
8. Since your time sucks anyway, it is important to stop and say hi to your family when you see them there cheering you on! But when your husband says, "Are you just going to stand here and chat or are you going to finish the race?" - you have to assume bonding time is over. Oh, and be prepared for the girls to scream for you when you leave.
9. If you have to get up at 4:30 in the morning to drive to a race, you may as well do it with your running buddies. Unless they are morning people. Then you just try to close your eyes and block them out as much as possible. They'll get the hint!
10. Since your time sucks anyway, you may as well grab that beer that is being handed to you at mile 6. You will regret it if you don't.
11. When you feel like quitting, glance over at the guy in the wheelchair and SUCK IT UP. What a blessing that you can run.
12. There will be many, many, many times during the race that you questions your own sanity. The theme, "It seemed like a good idea at the time.." rings so true!!
13. Crossing that finish line felt amazing, having friends to do it with was even more amazing and knowing that my family was there and proud of me was incredible. Then all the congrats I got from my FB friends was icing on an already yummy cake!

And there you have it my friends! I had high hopes that I could run this puppy in 2 hours based on my long run paces. I really thought I could do it. But due to my (ahem) circumstances alas I wasn't feeling the greatest and had to make a couple of potty stops along the way and that slowed me down. 2009 San Antonio RnR time: 2:16

While I will not let this time define me, I will beat it!!!

I have already begun looking at the location for my next half...anyone want to join me? It is way more fun to run with friends...

I'm running a half marathon tomorrow - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

In 24 hours I will be nervously standing at the start line with 35,000 other people at the San Antonio Rock and Roll Marathon.

And I am petrified.

Along with excited, anxious, overwhelmed, proud and a host of other feelings.

I remember 15 months ago, when I decided that I wanted to run a half marathon. At the time it seemed like such a dream. The twins had just turned a year old and I decided it was time to go back to the gym after almost 2 years of little to no exercise. We joined the local Y and I felt very good about leaving the kids in their amazing childcare. The kids loved going to the Y, it's really close to our house, brand new and clean, I had time to go and suddenly there was nothing stopping me from going to the gym. And that was the start of this journey.

I remember the first time I ran for 7 minutes straight. It felt amazing and I was so proud of myself. My next goal was 12 minutes, then a mile (yes, at first my mile took longer than 12 minutes!), then 2 miles, then 3... I was so shocked and proud that I could run 3 miles.

So I took the next step. There was this trekking class at the gym with all these girls who were real runners. Real runners. They ran fast and they ran intervals, sprints, 4x400's, repeats and they were real runners. I was so intimidated, but I joined one day. And that first day of class I ran 4 miles, longer than I had ever run. My new 'real runner' friends encouraged me the whole way. While they had run faster and farther than me, they still encouraged me in my accomplishment.

I kept running with these girls, signed up for my first half marathon and started training. Well, I got injured. My knees don't love to run. So I had to quit for 8 weeks. No running. Not getting to do that race was so hard. I felt like such a failure. A feeling I struggle with all too often and a word I use to define myself all too often.

So after taking lots of time off, I started to run again. Very slowly. 1 minute running, 3 minutes walking. While my knees weren't hurting, my ego was. But I kept at it until it felt good to run a mile. Then 2, then 3 and then I joined my 'real runner' friends again.

I, very nervously, signed up for the San Antonio Rock and Roll. It took me a long time to sign up because I was scared. Scared that I would have to quit and then feel like a failure...again. I'm sick of feeling like a failure. I'm sick of being a quitter. When things get tough...I quit. And there have only been 2 exceptions, being a wife and being a mom. I can't quit those. Everything else though, as soon as obstacles are in my way, I fold.

There have been obstacles in training for this race. I have had issues with my knee's, my piriformis (didn't even know what/where that was until it started killing me!), and the training schedule has been hard because my husband is a Resident and his schedule is erratic and because I have 4 little people that call me mom and because of soccer and schedules and...life. And I have been frustrated and overwhelmed and felt hopeless.

But I have refused to quit.

In many ways, this is more emotional for me than it is physical. At 32, I am still learning who I am and who I want to be.

And I want to be someone who finishes.

A couple of weeks ago I ran 9 miles. I got up early (something I hate to do), ran in the cold (something I hate to do), ran hills (something my knees hate to do), but did all of it anyway. I had a time in my head that I had hoped to finish in and I beat that time by 2 and a half minute. Doesn't sound like a lot, but in the running world, that's pretty good.

I was so proud of myself I cried. Sobbed on the side of the road like a crazy freak. I don't know how to say this without totally sounding selfish, but I did something that was all about me. No one else was depending on me to run, or needed me to do it, or had I committed to run for. NO ONE. It was just because I had set out to do it. There were hard parts to my run, but I didn't quit. I finished. Gosh, how often do I ever get to finish something I start as a mom and wife. That is just impossible to do and the feeling overwhelmed me.

And tomorrow I will know a whole different level of 'finish'.

There are so many things about tomorrow that have me nervous, at the top of the list is a number. The magical number that I would like to finish the race in. I am constantly reminding myself that I'm not defined by a number, this is my first race and have fun. Did you hear that self?

I definitely think that I will have fun. I'm running with my girls from the gym and am in the same corral as 2 of them. We're going down in a limo and have some VIP pass so will get dropped off at the race line! How cool is that?! And this is supposed to be a really FUN race. 26 bands along the race course and Joseph is bringing the kids to cheer me on - they are so excited. When I got home from my 10 mile run last week Caleb said, "I'm so proud of you mom!" He's told everyone at school and in the neighborhood that I am running a marathon. I love that kid!

So I'm filling my IPOD with rockin' tunes, getting my Garmin charged and preparing myself to take it all in and have fun! There probably won't be many pictures because my man will have his hands full with the kids (and he's terrible with the camera!) but if there are I will post them.

I've never run farther than 10 miles, so I'm hoping that sheer determination and adrenaline will carry me that last 3.1 miles. If you think about it, please say a prayer for me!

I'm sooooooooooooooooooooo excited!!!!!

Operation Christmas Child

This is one of my favorite annual things we do as a family. Joseph and I have been participating in Operation Christmas Child since before we had children and over the years it has been fun watching the kids progress in their understanding of OCC.

Each year we get 1 box per child and let the kids pick out things that they think their "friend" would like. In the past we've had many years where the boys cried because they weren't getting anything, but this year was the first year that the boys didn't ask for a thing and were SO excited about getting something for their little friend. Caleb has such a tender heart and cried a couple of times for these kids who have nothing. Heart felt compassion and gratefulness are two characteristics that I want my children to have, but are really hard to teach. And I love it when God gives me a glimpse into their hearts and into what He is doing in their little lives. Love it!

Caleb took great care in packing his box and writing his letter. He really wanted to put a camera in the box so that it would record the kids faces when they opened the box! Once Luke saw Caleb writing a letter he wanted to write one too. Then he drew two pictures, one of a sad little boy and then one of a happy boy with a present! So cute!!

Above are some pictures of our evening. Check out the letter that Caleb wrote all by himself. He even referenced his favorite verse. I wrote it out for him while he dictated it. I didn't even know he knew that verse, but it is definitely one that I will remind him is his favorite!

We included a picture and our address in hopes that maybe we will hear from these kids. We also prayed over these boxes and hope that they will bring joy and Jesus to some sweet children!!

If you haven't participated in OCC before, check it out. It has been a great opportunity to teach my kids while taking care of and loving on anothers!

Pumpkin Patch - Take 2

Remember how I told you that we had to go to a second pumpkin patch to get a family picture? Well here are the photo's from that day:

See this little face Lily Kate is making? That's her, "What? Are you talking to me? I may or may not listen to you, I'm thinking about it."

Ella on top, Little Kate on the bottom

(top & bottom) Ella Grace

Fun Fall Day!!

My favorite problem!

(To the tune of how do you solve a problem like Maria)

He climbs a tree and scrapes his knee
His jeans have got a tear
He waltzes on the soccer fields
And whistles to the air
And underneath his bed
He has candy wrappers hiding there
I even heard him singing in the bathtub

He's always last in the car

But his penitence is real

He's always late for everything
Except for every meal
I hate to have to say it
But I very firmly feel
Lukie IS an asset to the Mad House!

I'd like to say a word in his behalf
Lukie makes me laugh

How do you solve a problem like Luke Mad?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Luke Mad?
A flibbertijibbet! A will-o'-the wisp! A clown!

Many a thing you know you'd like to tell him
Many a thing he ought to understand
But how do you make him stay
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand

Oh, how do you solve a problem like Luke Mad?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

When I'm with him I'm confused
Out of focus and bemused
And I never know exactly where I am
Unpredictable as weather
He's as flighty as a feather
He's a darling! He's a demon! He's a lamb!

He'd outpester any pest
Drive a hornet from its nest
He could throw a whirling dervish out of whirl
He is gentle! He is wild!
He's a riddle! He's a child!
He's a headache! He's an angel!
He's a boy!

How do you solve a problem like Luke Mad?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Luke Mad?
A flibbertijibbet! A will-o'-the wisp! A clown!

Many a thing you know you'd like to tell him
Many a thing he ought to understand
But how do you make him stay
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand

Oh, how do you solve a problem like Luke Mad?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

The Patch

A couple of weekends ago we went on our annual trip to the pumpkin patch with some friends from our Sunday school class. We have gone to the same patch for the past couple of years and were excited to try a new one this year. It was a beautiful morning and we had a great time. Here are some pictures from our outing:

Someday I will look back on this and laugh...maybe

I don't know what to say about my day yesterday other than to tell you I am traumatized and it may take me years to recover...or months...or weeks...actually, I think I'll be better tomorrow. But it really was a crazy day...

It began at 5:45 AM. If you know me, you know, I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON. I'm really not a morning person on the weekend and REALLY not a morning person on the 1 day (of the last 8) I can sleep in because my man is off. But alas, Hal says I must get my butt up and run, so I got my butt up and ran. 9 very. long. miles. 2 and a half minutes faster than my goal time, which did make me cry, but-that's-a-whole-nother-story.

So I get home, quickly shower and we head to a nearby little faux pumpkin patch. Oh, you heard we went to a different one last weekend? We did. But we didn't get a family picture, so I dragged us out again. They had a moon bounce, face painting and the hit of the morning - the cake walk. That one stumped me? But, hey I knew where the boys were the whole time! Caleb was determined to bring us home some sweets (because we don't have enough candy?) and that determination paid off! He was so excited.

Then we get home, put the sisters down for their nap and I beg for 37 minutes off my feet until I have to go to my home away from home - the grocery store.

After that was...

Soccer game at 3pm.
Soccer game at 5pm.
Friends over for dinner & some trick o treat action. Now, this was a little stressful because between our two families there were 10 VERY excited children. Very, very, very excited.

And this is where things started to go downhill very, very, very fast.

Let me preface this next story by telling you that we went to trunk or treat on Friday night and Lily Kate spent the whole time in her Daddy's arms because she was terrified of people in costumes. All people in costumes, but especially people in scary costumes. Tiny predicament for Halloween.

I had a bad feeling that she wasn't going to love being in costume. Bad feeling. Bad, bad feeling. But I shove that feeling out because I know they are going to love the costumes that I made, with my own two hands and LOTS of love, especially for them.

Happy thoughts. Good thoughts. Delusional thoughts...

So all 10 kids are getting into costume in the living room, the noise level is that of a NFL football game, the doorbell is ringing with Halloween'ers, I'm exhausted from the busy day, we start to pull the costumes out for the sisters and...

They go into major meltdown mode. They want nothing to do with those costumes and are begging to go to bed. It was bad. We tried everything - begging, reasoning (yeah, like that ever works!), bribery all to no avail.

I was sad, dissapointed and defeated. JKM on the other hand was determined (wonder where Caleb gets that from?) and convinced he could get them in it. At least for 1 picture.

So he takes them to the laundry room, turns off the lights and tricks them into thinking they are putting on their jammies. No, we are not above trickery. Little Kate fell for it and actually liked having her costume on, for a few minutes anyway. The Grace didn't fall for it or ever like wearing it. But candy kept her happy.

Our feelings of triumph literally only lasted for seconds before the girls saw one of our friends in a scary costume and lost it for good. We had to take them to their rooms to calm them down and get their jammies on them. Game over.

We went trick or treating with our friends, all through the neighborhood, and by the time we got home I told everyone goodnight, shuffled to my room and crashed hard. While the boys were still up and our company was over. I was stick-a-fork-in-me done!

And that, my friends was my Halloween. Now, your reward for reading that wordy post about drama, the part that you are waiting on, pictures...

But before I begin, I have to tell you that both sisters are wearing their costumes backwards. Apparently while Daddy was dressing them in the dark he didn't notice that he was putting them on backwards. So, I'm not sure if you can tell what they are... At least that is what we'll blame it on if you can't tell!

My little bat with candy in her mouth so that she doesn't cry.

Lily the spider with Spiderman.

My boys look adorable. My sweet girls look...sad. They aren't wearing their cute head peices or their happy smiles.
Oh, well, I guess there is always next year...

Flashback Friday - Halloween Costumes

I love, love, love Halloween! Love it! The costumes are my FAVORITE part. While I was looking back through old pictures, for some reason I couldn't find 2002 & 2003. Caleb was a frog & tiger those years. You'll just have to take my word for it - he was cute!

I'm a theme-y mom and am proud to say that I was able to pull it off once again this year! But that will have to wait until tomorrow...

Halloween 2004

Fireman & Dalmation - Caleb 2 & Luke 2mo.

Halloween 2005

Cowboy & Indian - Caleb 3 & Luke 1

(this was my first homemade costume!)

Halloween 2006

Batman & Robin - Caleb 4 & Luke 2

October 2007

Knights & Princesses - Caleb 5, Luke 3 & Twins 6mo.

(I made the tu-tu's & headbands)

Halloween 2008

Obi Wan, Anakin & Ewoks! - Caleb 6, Luke 4 & Twins 1

(Daddy made Obi Wan's cloak and I pseudo made the Ewok costumes)

Let me know if you play along....

So cute I could eat them!

My little pumpkins 1 year ago.

Delicious!!
I've been looking at old pictures in preparation for my Flashback Friday - Halloween Costumes Edition and it has been fun!! I can't wait to show you...

A walk inside the head of Sab Mad - be afraid...

Do you want to see the super cute thing that I am drooling over currently:

"Our new felt countdown calendar helps everyone get into the Thanksgiving spirit well in advance. It has 60 I am thankful cards for each day's pocket that promote the act of gratitude."

Seriously, I went to the outlets last week and wandered into the Pottery Barn Outlet when lo and behold I saw this sweetness! I love family traditions and immediately thought of dozens of ways we could use this to create memories! So I sat there, held it in my hands and debated...

"I am here to buy clothes for our children, not things for our house," says Practical Sabrina.

"But how often do you ever buy things for the house? Really, splurge a little. You only live once..." says Very Impratical Sabrina.

Practical Sabrina replies, "I have been splurging, see all these bags?"

"Um, those were clothes for your kids. That's not splurging!"

"Apparently you didn't see the price of those tights for the sisters! Splurge. I've already spent too much money and I don't need to spend anymore. Especially $70 on something that will be hung on the wall for 28 days. It's adorable, cute and I really want it, but it is not in the budget!"

Impractical Sabrina says (very unfairly), "But you can't put a price on memories..."

"You're right," says Practical Sabrina. "I can't, but Dr. Mad can and he would think that's a lot of cash."

Impractical Sabrina replies with, "Who are you kidding, he doesn't care. He wants you to be happy and you know he wouldn't put a price on your happiness."

So Practical Sabrina stood there and stared, dreamed, imagined and then walked out of the store. And the whole way home thought about this adorable wall hanging.

And apparently is still thinking about it.

The ugly side of anger

While Joseph was gone, I really felt like my world was spinning out of control. Okay, maybe not my whole world, just my children. But since they are my little world, I guess it was my world. In any case, at first I was sure that the kids were out of control. There was lots of arguing, fighting and everything was a long drawn out battle that I was losing. I wasn't having much fun being a mommy and I'm sure they weren't having much fun being my kids.

Then God really spoke to my heart and reminded me that they weren't the issue. They were doing what children are supposed to do - be sinful and selfish. My response to them was the problem. My expectations of them were the problem. I was the problem.

I got this book on anger and God has used it to speak HUGE truth into my life. Are you ready for what I've learned? Here goes:

Kindness leads to repentance, anger breeds wrath.

Simple, logical, no brainer, huh? For everyone other than me, I guess.

I have been so angry lately. Angry at the kids for not behaving the way that they should. Angry at Joseph for leaving me here to do this hard thing by myself all the time. Angry at people for judging my motives. But most of all angry at God.

Very angry with God. Because I have forgotten who is the Potter and who is the Clay.

So I have been taking it out on everyone around me. It's no wonder that there is so much anger in this house. Anger breeds anger. Kindness leads to repentance.

I have been pondering Romans 2:4-6 and LOVE the way that The Message says it:

"You didn't think, did you, that just by pointing your finger at others you would distract God from seeing all your misdoings and from coming down on you hard? Or did you think that because he's such a nice God, he'd let you off the hook? Better think this one through from the beginning. God is kind, but he's not soft. In kindness he takes us firmly by the hand and leads us into a radical life-change. "

Gosh I love that he is doing that to me and that is exactly what I want to do to my children. Lead them to a radical life change - a relationship with Jesus!

Ultimately, in the end, when it is all said and done what I want for my kids is not to be successful or have good self image or be rich or any of the other things the world defines as successful. Ultimately I want them to repent for theirs sins, walk away from them and walk toward Jesus. Walk with Jesus. And if they happen to have success, riches, whatever...great! What an earthly bonus.

So how do I make that happen as a mother?

Definintely less anger, more kindness. Kindness that takes them 'firmly by the hand.' Anger has a place and isn't bad, but I don't want that to be my "go-to" emotion. I've used it as a crutch far too long to mask fear, insecurity and sadness. I don't want to pass on this legacy, so I need to stop it. Today. Each day.

And that is hard for someone who clings to anger.

Holy God, please continue to change me and teach me and mold me. More of you, less of me. Thank you for your kindness, grace and mercy that led me to repentance and a radical life change. Help me to help my children. And when I fail, please remind me that in my weakness you are strong. Where there is damage I have caused with my children, husband or relationships because of anger, I ask that you please heal in the way that only you can - completely. I love you Father.

Blogging is a little slow around here because life is moving so fast!

Flashback Friday - Pumpkin Patch Edition

Ahhhh...
The Pumpkin Patch, my favorite thing about October! I loved my walk down Pumpkin Patch Lane!

October 2004

October 2005

October 2006

October 2007

October 2008

Next week I'm flashin' back to years past Halloween costumes!!! Seriously, I am SO excited...

My life in numbers

Number of times I work out each week - 6
Number of pounds I want to lose - 13

Number of minutes it takes me to drive to the gym - 7
Number of minutes it takes me to drive to the boys school - 8
Number of minutes it takes me to get the kids in the car - 19

Number of times per day I hear, "But he..." - 27
Number of times I say, "We are accountable for our actions, not the actions of others..." - 27

Number of years I have had a child in diapers - 7
Number of years in my married life that I have not had a child in diapers - 1

Number of months my husband has been gone this year - 3
Number of months he will be gone next year - 3

Number of MOPS groups I have been in - 5
Number of MOPS groups in this city I have attended - 3

Number of times I cook a meal from scratch these days - 1 (estimating high)
Number of days we eat breakfast for dinner because I am too lazy to cook these days - 4

Number of times in a day I say, "Do you need to go potty?" - 1000
Number of times the girls say, "yes" - 20

Number of email accounts I have - 3
Number of email accounts that I check - 1

Number of loads of laundry I did today - 8
Number of loads I still have left to do - 2

Number of hours I sleep at night while hubby is gone - 6
Number of hours I sleep at night while hubby is here - 9

Number of shoes in my gym bag - 3

Number of times I check the mail each week - 1

Number of quarts of water I drink each day - 2

Number of friends I have on facebook - 288
Number of friends on facebook that I'm actually friends with - 28ish

Number of miles I ran today - 5
Number of miles I will run this week - 18

Number of days I consecutively practiced yoga last week - 3
Number of days I wish I could practice yoga - 7

Number of times I have talked to my man today - 1
Number of times I normally talk to my man in a given day - 20

Number of times I told the twins to sit at the table and not stand on chairs - 32
Number of times I threatened to spank them if they didn't sit - 43
Number of times I spanked them - 0

Number of unread posts in my google reader - 28

Number of times in a week I say, "Luke where are your shoes?" - 307
Number of times in a week he says, "Um, I don't know..." with the most gorgeous eyes twinkling at me - 307

Number of science experiments I did this weekend - 3
Number of those experiments that I could actually explain the results - 0

Number of books I am currently reading - 7
Number of books I have read this year - 0

Number of times I think to myself that I am SO blessed - countless!!

Flashback Friday

(You can click on the pictures if you want to make them larger.)

The patients are running the asylum...

...That is what I told my friend this morning when she asked how things are going.

Seriously, we had the worst morning today. Whining, drama, arguing, disobedience, wet beds, soccer balls threatening to break things in the house, and lost shoes all before 8am. On a Monday morning. When the house needs to be ready for the cleaners. And the kids are late for school. And Daddy is gone.

So I did what every good, patient, kind, loving, Godly mother does. I took a deep breath, counted to ten and...lost my mind. I really lost control. Not one of my finer moments.

*sigh*

Then on the way to school I pulled over to have a come-to-Jesus-moment. The boys asked why we were pulling over and when I told them to unbuckle Caleb said, "Are you going to make us walk to school?"

Because I typically ask you to get out of the car and walk?!?!?

*sigh*

"No, Love, I want to pray." I replied. So all 5 of us held hands and I prayed for us all and then gave a mini-lecture about us being a team and one of our players is missing (Daddy!) so we all need to pull together to win.

In Luke fashion he says, "Who are we going to beat?"

The devil, Luke, the devil.

And that was all before 8:10 am.

The good news is that the rest of the day was fabulous and the kids have been divine!

I also must report that on my first full day of potty duty with the sisters, I was very successful. Not only did they NOT regress, but they had no accidents, stayed dry and successfully went potty at the gym today! Whoo-hoo! It's all JKM though. I am thinking about hiring him out as a Potty Training Guru. He can make us some extra money in his spare time.

Because he has so much of it...NOT!

In other news, I'm working on recovering some chairs and have decided that my sewing skills leave much to be desired. I'll take some before and after pictures, but I can guarantee you that no one will be calling me with a job as a seamstress.

I have high hopes for a better day tomorrow. One key element would be a rested mama, so I better get to bed...

Potty Update

The good new: The sisters are in full potty train mode.
The bad news: Daddy is leaving in a couple of days and I will be ON MY OWN! With them. Not completely potty trained! Oh man, oh man.

Joseph has been AMAZING and has worked so hard potty training the sisters this past week. I have always been impressed and in awe of the fact that he trained both boys, but am even more impressed and in awe that he can also add the twins to his resume!

Love pretty much used the same methods that he implemented with the boys, with the exception of rewards. The boys were rewarded with anything with sugar. The sisters have an affection for chocolate. Just.like.mama they are motivated by chocolate.

Works when you are 2 and training for the potty.
Doesn't work when you are 32 and training for a marathon.

In case you were wondering.

Now, I wouldn't say that the girlies are 100% potty trained, but I they are doing really well. Ella even told me that she had to go potty while in the bath tub last night! Initially, Ella was the one who was rockin' the potty. She has since digressed and Lily Kate is rockin' it now.

So, yes they are both still a little shaky, but we have progressed WAY too far to go back now.

I will not let my man down.

I can do this.
I can do this.
I can do this...
...I think.

Flashback Friday

In honor of soccer season starting and our first game tomorrow, I'm dedicating this Flashback Friday to soccer seasons past. Here is a play by play of my boys love affair with soccer.

Fall - 2005

This was Caleb's first year to play soccer. He was 3 and it was a non-competitive teaching league. Initially he was nervous - understatement! - to be on the field without Daddy holding his hand, but we really saw his confidence grow by the end of the season. Luke, on the other hand, was obsessed with being on the field with the big kids. I spent most of soccer trying to keep him off the field and out of the way. He was actually really good at kicking & controlling the ball!

Fall - 2006

We had just moved here and this was Caleb's first year playing on a competitive league. Luke really wanted to play, but he still wasn't old enough. I remember the picture above like it was yesterday. Caleb was so proud that he could hold the ball with his foot like a real soccer player. Luke, as usual, copying his big brother!

Fall - 2007

Whooo-hooo! Luke is finally old enough to play. And boy was he SO excited!! Caleb had this coach that was convinced that he could not only teach 5 year olds specific plays, that they would follow through and do them. Mmmm, not-so-much! At this age you should be glad they aren't still chasing butterflys all over the field!

Fall 2008 -

Seasoned soccer player is what we have now. And I am officially a soccer mom!

If you play along, leave a comment and let me know! Also next week's Flashback will be fall themed - pumpkin patches, leaves, ect. Oh I have some good ones!! Then the following week will be Halloween costumes of past years. Yours, kids, hubby's - I want to see them all!

Weeds be gone!

I read the following in my quiet time the other day and it has been really resonating with me a lot lately. It's a quote by Charles Swindoll in his book Stress Fracture:

'The closer you get to authentic, the less you care about the artificial.'

It's funny how God speaks to me. I read this amazing piece of wisdom and then a couple of days later got an email from a friend asking for prayers on behalf of some friends she went to college with. As our friend kept us updated, via email, on the situation with her friends, I was also keeping tabs on the plight of this amazing couple through their blog. Well, I already sent you to their story, but if you want to go back for an update I promise you will leave inspired.

In the end I have no idea if Sara Sullivan ate organic, what her thoughts were on homeschooling, christian school, public school or cloth diapers, I don't know if she drove a hybrid or an SUV, I do know (through reading her blog) she did exercise, liked yoga and went to a ladies bible study, but I don't know if she was a democrat or republican, watched tv or not, had a clean house or a messy one, recycled or not...and the list of what I don't know goes on. And at the end of the day, I'm not sure that any of that really matters.

What matters is that all through her blog you know who she loves most in this world.

What matters is that she had relationships in her life. Lots of them

What matters is when things didn't make sense she rested safely in the arms of her Savior.

What matters is when times got tough, she kept her eyes fixed on Jesus.

What matters is that she is leaving a legacy of lives touched through the way she lived her life - in complete surrender to her Savior. If only, I am so blessed.

I struggle over here. I struggle with lots on my plate, a house that doesn't look like a model show home, my weight, what to do about the kids education, my obsessoin with the gym, why my carpet always needs vacuumed, making chore chars for the kids, finding time to clean, Halloween costumes, soccer balls, bills, what I feed my kids - even whether or not I should make my own laundry soap! And while I'm not saying that those things don't have a place, I am saying that they take up too much time in my day. Time that I need to spend getting closer to my Savior.

Because I have a feeling that the closer I get to the authentic, the artificial in my life will become more clear. And then I can weed out that artificial. Because in the end I want to leave a legacy of rich relationships and complete surrender to my Savior.

I have a feeling I'm going to have to do a lot of weeding.

Beach Trip

We went to the beach over the weekend and had an amazing time! We weren't sure what the kids were going to do (it was the girls first time at the beach!), what the weather would be like, how the girls would do without their naps...SO many variables when dealing with kids.

We were amazed at how smoothly the trip went. The kids had so much fun and so did we. We went with some good friends of ours that have 6 kids and that added to the fun! Here are some pictures from the trip - in no particular order!

Oh, yeah baby. This is what I did most of the time - kick my feet up, watch the kids all have a blast and chill. It was awesome. Why haven't we gone to the beach before?
I had been watching the weather because it was supposed to rain. 40% chance from 9am-5pm. Lucky for us, weather.com was wrong. Very wrong. It was beautiful! Look at that blue sky!
My four Mad kids. Gosh, I love those little people!
Toddler feet, don't you love 'em?!
Lily Kate, true to form, really liked the waves and water but was super hesitant. She takes her time to get used to things and absolutely does NOT like to be rushed.
Ella Grace on the other hand is fearless! Unlike her sister she doesn't mind getting dirty and loves adventure.
Little Kate. Isn't she yummy?
Caleb and his best friend AJ. Aren't they cute? They are in the same class at school and rumor has it that the girls chase them in the playground and try to kiss them. Thankfully they haven't caught my boy yet! I have made it clear to him that the only girl that kisses him is his mama!
Luke and his best friend Josh. It really is great being good family friends with the boys best friends.
The girls had watched the other kids pulling each other on the boogie boards, but I don't think they got the memo that you have to be in the water for it to work well!
Little Kate...
...that girl loved running in the sand and chasing the seagulls! She didn't catch one, and I shudder to think about what would have happened if she actually got close to one!
Caleb running in the water. Doesn't that bring back great memories of being a kid at the beach?

Lily Kate
The sisters.


Sitting with their papa, enjoying the little waves.


And this is where the big kids were most of the time. It doesn't look like it, but they are actually pretty far out there. More great memories...
Daddy and his Diva's

Caleb flying his kite
Christian, isn't he cute?! We want to do an arranged marriage for him and one of the twins, but he can't decide which one he wants. And we aren't into polygamy.

Christian being a boy...
...and Lily Kate being a girl. You go, sister, and tell him that's not appropriate!

Ella and Daddy
Poor Ella. The girls didn't get their nap and I wasn't sure how they would do, but they did great. I was shocked when I asked Ella if she wanted to take a nap and she laid down and went right to sleep!! What a great way to fall asleep - ocean breeze and the sound of waves in the background. Unfortunately her wake up wasn't that great. Her sister came over and started messing with her. Silly Sister...
The Collins Fam. I am so thankful for them and their friendship.


The sunset on our way home! It really was an awesome time!!

Prayer request

I'm off to the beach today, but before I go I wanted to ask you guys to please pray for the Sullivans. I'm not sure if any of you heard about their story, but it really touched me, made me think and hold the kids a little tighter. I don't personally know them, they are friends of friends, but as I was reading through some old posts on her blog I was surprised how many connections I had to Sara. Joseph was working in the ER that she was brought to and while she wasn't his patient, he remembers her case. Also, her MFM OB was mine too and she is from the Houston area, really close to my parents. Their story is heartbreaking and their faith is amazing and inspiring.

I stumbled across this quote and found it helpful while processing all this:
In this crazy world, there's an enormous distinction between good times and bad, between sorrow and joy. But in the eyes of God, they're never separated. Where there is pain, there is healing. Where there is mourning, there is dancing. Where there is poverty, there is the kingdom. - Henri J. M. Nouwen

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." - Romans 8:38-39

The funeral is today. Please keep them in your prayers.

Flashback Friday!

This week I am flashing back to one year ago! I'm always amazed, when looking through old photo's, at how much difference one year makes in kids, especially in toddlers. This one was fun because the sisters look so...babyish.

(click on the photo if you want to see the pictures better)

Mad moments...

...in bullet points - my favorite!

• I'm contemplating a hair cut. My hair has gotten ridiculously long. Like I-have-to-yank-it-out-from-under-my-husband-when-he-rolls-over-on-it-in-the-middle-of-the-night long. But here is my dilemma: I have had my hair all lengths and although I like it really short, my man says when it's short I look like I have a helmet on. How's that for brutal honesty? Hmmm. He loves my hair long. I like to grow it out and then cut it short, but my fear is that while my hair grows like a weed, what if now that I am getting older it won't grow back? Isn't there like some rule that your hair stops growing as you get older or am I crazy? And then my other fear is that what if when it's short it irritates me while I run? I can't have any irritations when I run!
• I did find out that I could sell my hair on the Internet, for big bucks (like anywhere from $500-$1000) because it is virgin hair (no dye, no perm), ridiculously thick and long. When I told my man that he said, "Where's the scissors?" Apparently, money talks around here.
• So, if I'm not getting a hair cut, my other thought is - DYE! I would love to dye my hair. I've never done it before, but I think that it would look really cool with a pink stripe in it. Yes, I am serious. Once again though, my man thinks that is absurd. So, I gave him 2 choices: pink hair or nose ring. He's still thinking, I'm still serious...
• Well, that is 3 minutes of your life you will never get back reading about my hair drama. On to other things...
• School is going great for the boys. They both love it! Check out Caleb's cursive:

There is some story that my MIL loves to tell that when Joseph was in kindergarten his teacher declared that his handwriting was so bad the only thing he would amount to in life was being a doctor. His handwriting is terrible and she was right. I wonder what you become if you're cursive is this fabulous?!?

• While the boys are in school, the girls and I are trying to find out where we belong. It has been an adjustment for me. For the past couple of years everything has revolved my big boys - their schedule and activities. And now they are gone and the shishers and I are finding our groove. I'm feeling lonely and need to find some friends for the sisters and I. So...
• We go to the gym every morning, we've joined a great MOPS group at church, we go to the park & play and are looking for a playgroup. It's a start. Joseph rolls his eyes when I say I have no friends. He claims to not know anyone who has more friends. He's right, I have friends, I'm just looking for that one that has a husband in residency, loves going to the gym, runs and has twin girls. Really, is that too much to ask?!
• Until then, it has been fun being with the Divas - they are crazy and make me laugh all the time! We have lots of girl time and every time I go shopping with them, I am reminded at how terrible they are and how it's all my fault! I seriously let them get away with murder. It's bad. But they are just so darn cute!
• I had my Mother's of Multiples sale last weekend and got rid of tons of girl clothes! The amount of clothes these girls have is bordering ridiculous. And now that those clothes are gone, they have made room for their fall wardrobe. I am having serious fun shopping for that!
• You can rest easy tonight knowing that I have figured out the Halloween costumes for this year. Whew, there was some stress, fast talking and bribing involved - but it is done! And there will be no changing of minds or reveals quite yet. I will just say that I am now on a 5 year streak for group themed Halloween costumes. The things that make me happy...
• My sister has been living with us now for the past month and it is going really well! She's going to college here and just got a job this week. It has been so nice having company when my man is gone and she has been super helpful with the kids when we need her. It's nice to have a babysitter around for impromptu date nights. I try really hard not to abuse her, wouldn't want to run her off quite yet...
• We are going to the beach this weekend and I am super excited. We are going with some of our good friends who have 7 kids. It should be a blast!!
• Soccer season starts next week and the boys are thrilled!
• Joseph has been on nights all month and pulled his last one last night. Whew, I'm glad that is over. It wasn't that bad. The most painful part is that he sleeps in our room, so I hate going in there to shower, change or anything else for fear of waking him. It will be nice to have my room back! He's off for the next 11 days - whoooo-hooo - and then will be out of town for a while - booooo.
• And on his week off, he is geared up to (drum roll please) potty train the twins. I-am-so-not-ready-for-this! I was geared up for it, but then changed my mind a couple of days ago. When I say this out loud, I laugh at myself because I don't really have to do much. Or at least that is how it's been in the past. Joseph potty trained the boys and did a perfect job. Well, perfect with one and the other one...let's just say we got a call this afternoon to bring a change of clothes because he had an accident. But it's not Joseph's fault that child is way too busy playing to worry about little things like going to the bathroom!
• I digress, back to the twins - while Love is off and will solely dedicate the time to training the twins, he will leave. And then I will have to commit to what he started and I am bad at commitment. Hence the reason that he potty trains.
• So, I'm still thinking about whether or not to potty train. I did, however, have fun buying girl panties!!!!! I've never bought girl panties and they are sooo cute.

Alrighty, that is all (and wayyy too much) for now. I really doubt that any of you read through that and I don't blame you. I wouldn't either. I just missed y'all!

Happy Fall Y'all

A new bloggy look for the fall!

Luke's Birthday pictures a little late...

My camera battery died, so I don't have many pictures. Hate it when that happens!

You can click on the picture to make it bigger.

Oh, Miriam, this did not go well!

My sweet friend Miriam is trying to help me figure out how to make a collage...here is my first try. I'm not doing so well. Miriam = good teacher. Sab Mad = bad student!

Is this another sign it's time?

"okay, are you sure you know what you're doing?"
"yes, don't worry. mama gets the wipes out and ready first. trust me, i know what i'm doing..."
"like mama says, play with the wipes and don't fuss. don't wiggle."
"okay, mama, stop taking pictures and come help shisher. she's not cleaning me with the wipes, she's trying to cover me with them."

And that is what I caught those two doing the other day. I love how they used a magna doodle pad as their changing pad!