I really never had any dreams of getting married. I didn't grow up dreaming about my wedding or what my house would look like or how many kids I would have. I actually didn't even think that I would ever get married. When I met Love, I was a self-professed vagabond, who was carefree, spontaneous, adventurous and had no plans of marrying and having children. I wanted to be a missionary in Africa. I had plans for roaming the world and sharing how Jesus changed my life. And marriage wasn't even on the radar, much less in the picture.
It's funny how life changes. Because within 7 months of dating Lovey I was married, had moved to a state I thought I would never visit much less live, and was pregnant. And yes, in that order. I remember our first Christmas together (in Alaska!) thinking that exactly 1 year earlier I never in my most wild dreams would have pictured where I am today - married, pregnant, and oh yeah even Alaska. Wildly crazy.
Life is rarely how I picture it. I'm not sure that I ever imagined what marriage would look like, but if I did, this isn't it. It's so complicated. There is good, hard and not-so-good. We have had all three. How could you not when you have a life that is as full as ours? We're in a hard spot right now. Or actually coming out of one. We've been challenged a lot in this thing called marriage. And there have been many times where giving up has felt way easier than learning and growing. But I know that the only way that we will thrive, because I don't want to just survive marriage, is by remembering the covenant that we have made before God. Covenants aren't broken. People are and hearts are broken, but God's covenants are not.
So we move forward. Sometimes in tiny, little, cautious steps and other times in huge leaps. But we move forward. And forward is a good direction in marriage.
I love my man. He deals with crazy every day at work. And then comes home to even more! But that is what I love about him. He knows every day on his way home that he is coming home to crazy. And he still comes home. And he works hard to love on us in tangible ways. He is my partner in every sense of the word. There isn't a job around here that is "my job" or "his job" because we really do share in the workload. Okay girlfriends, sometimes he does more! I admit it. But sometimes I do too...sometimes?!
I also love that my man loves Jesus and has a relationship with him. Last night, I was sharing my heart and telling Joseph all about VBS and how I was going to present the gospel today. He 'gets' it. And cares. And prays. And teaches his children.
Yep, I love that man.
God makes me laugh on a regular basis. Our plans rarely ever match up. Here I am 8 years later a military wife, having done 3 major cross country moves, with 4 kids, a dog, having lived through a career change, medical school and now residency. I can't even imagine what the next 8 years have in store. I know that they will be full of laughter and joy, but I also know there will be hard times that test us. I also know without a shadow of a doubt that we love Jesus. And that he's enough. More than enough.
I love you JKM. You are my hero!