Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Month 2

I think the second (and third) month of my sweet girl's life was the hardest. Joseph left for 5 weeks when the girls were 5 weeks old. It was so hard without him. Hard and so lonely.

Joseph has always been the one to get up with the babies/kids in the night. When I have a new baby, Joseph is the one to go and get the baby, bring them to me to feed and then change their diaper and put them back to bed. It's worked for us. And when he left and I had to do it on my own, it made me realize how lonely and difficult it was having a new baby in the house without him.

The girl's weren't sleeping through the night yet and I wasn't sure that they ever would. They took turns waking up all night long. Once I got one baby quiet and sleeping, the other one would wake up. It was awful.

We had friends and family take turns coming in town and it was such a huge blessing. While the nights were lonely, at least during the day there was someone to help with the boys. I felt like those weeks were spent either sleeping, feeding a baby or holding a crying baby. And they were.

One would think that since this wasn't my first time at the rodeo, I would be this experienced mama who wouldn't make dumb mistakes. One would think... But for some reason (probably sleep deprivation) I thought that because I had 2 babies, I needed to feed them twice as long. So, I was spending 8 hours a day sitting in my chair nursing 2 babies!!! By the time I was done nursing them and changing their diapers, it was time for them to take a nap. I would grab something to eat, kiss my boys and then take a 30 min. nap before it was time to feed them again. I seriously felt like a feeding machine.

And then I went to see the pediatrician and she asked me why I was nursing them for so long and said that they probably weren't even eating the whole time...just using me as a pacifier. So I cut down their nursing from 45min. to 20 min. And it was amazing how much time I felt like I got back! Amazing!

Although I have just made this sound terrible (and there were very bad moments) whenever I would look at those little beauties, it was all worth it. The little beauties have been worth every moment, good and bad!

Here are someof my favorite pictures...

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